When any marriage breaks up and heads for divorce, it can be devastating for everyone involved. However, when that mix includes children, it can be that much harder. If you are in an unhappy marriage and are wanting to get out and start anew, you may wonder how you can do so when you have children. If you are ready to leave your unhappy marriage behind but still want to maintain your children’s happiness, here are some tips you should keep in mind as you begin your new journey.
Talk to Your Kids
Even though you and your spouse are not on the best of terms, it will be crucial that the two of you sit down with your kids to discuss the upcoming divorce. By doing so, you can let your kids know the divorce is not their fault, and that you and your spouse still love them very much. This will also give your kids the chance to ask questions and get answers to such topics as where they will live, if they will be able to attend their current school, and more.
If you want your divorce to go smoothly while you and your spouse still maintain most of the decision-making power along the way, try using mediation instead of relying on one court hearing after another. By doing so, your mediation sessions will not be matters of public record, you can still retain a family law services attorney to offer advice, and you will be able to arrive at important decisions much quicker.
Create Separate Yet Positive Environments
Once you and your spouse start living apart from one another, create a separate yet positive environment for your children. For example, make sure you start creating new traditions with your kids at your new home since this will help put them at ease. Also, should your ex-spouse drop by, be respectful of your kids, and don’t engage in any arguments or other confrontations.
Forgive Your Spouse
Ultimately, your main priority will be to put your children first. To do so, you will need to do the hard emotional work necessary to forgive your spouse. If you don’t, your children will continue to pick up the bad vibes you are sending out about their other parents, which could make your relationship with your kids more difficult. To avoid this, be willing to forgive, forget, and move forward on a positive path.
If you take these steps as you prepare to divorce, you and your kids will emerge much happier than you ever imagined.